How do you motivate others? Help them catch your vision? Get them to see what you see? This is something I've thought a lot about in both my professional and personal life. Here are a few things I learned from a recent bout with my three-year-old.
A few mornings ago, I took a deep breath and went to tackle the impossible task of helping my son get ready for the day. He has always had an issue with clothes. He went through the wear nothing stage. Now he is in the wear nothing that at least remotely resembles Spiderman. If it's not red or blue, you can forget about it. Trying to put clothes on a three-year-old that doesn't want to wear them is about the closest that I've come to steer wresting. Here are a few things I learned about motivation through this process.
1. Your attitude is going to greatly influence their reaction
If I am in a hurry or in a bad mood, getting my son to get ready for the day never goes well. I believe he picks up on my mood and if I'm ready to fight to get his clothes on, he is ready to fight back. Sadly to say, the stubborn three-year-old almost always wins in the situation. But if I can approach him in a fun and loving way, he softens like a little puffball and is much more likely to do what I need him to do.
The same goes when I am trying to motivate my staff or co-workers. If I go into a conversation with the wrong attitude, it never goes well. Things I say are going to be taken the wrong way and people end up demotivated instead. But if I can stay positive and upbeat in my conversations, people are much more likely to understand and be motivated to do what I say.
2. Tell them what it will do for them
I found a little trick that has helped me be more successful in the dressing a three-year-old department. If I can find the smallest little detail about his clothing and tell him how it relates to Spiderman, he will almost always put the clothes on. It can be as small as finding the stripes on his pants and telling him that they are actually webs and will give him more web blasting super powers. It may not sound like much, but he eats it up.
Sometimes all you need to do is help someone catch the vision of how a task will have an impact on the company and their personal or professional development. Think of Daniel from the classic movie Karate Kid. He resented the menial tasks he was doing until Mr. Miyagi showed him how they were turning him into a Karate master. The same will happen to you when you help others catch the vision of what they are doing.
3. A little extra incentive goes a long way
I'm not sure this is exactly good parenting practice, but if things are going rough and nothing else is working I have been know to throw in a little bribe. It's amazing what a small piece of candy will do to get a little boy to cooperate.
It is important to note that not everyone is motivated by incentives in the same way. Most people will tell you that they are motivated by money, which to some degree is probably true. But many people are much more motivated by other things that really don't cost a thing. Sometimes just giving people ownership over a project or giving them special recognition in a company meeting is much more motivating than a pay raise or bonus ever would be. That being said, I've never met anyone that didn't gladly accept a pay raise or bonus.
Something that I've learned in both parenting and leadership is that there is rarely a one-size-fits-all answer to a challenging question. My hope is that this will give you a few ideas of things to try, whether you are trying to wrestle clothes on a Spiderman three-year-old or motivate your team to take things to the next level.