How to Physically Connect in a Socially Distant World

As an introvert,  I will admit that as things started shutting down because of Covid-19 in March 2020, I wasn’t sad.  I was actually kind of excited.  I was excited to just hunker down with my wife and 5 kids and not have to worry about social events (with the exception of having tickets to Dear Evan Hansen that got cancelled and not being able to go on our trip to Costa Rica that was planned 9 months earlier). I’m usually terribly uncomfortable in social situations and to have an excuse not to interact in that way was actually kind of nice.  Back in March, it was expected that this would last a couple of weeks.  Just a little break and then things would get back to normal.  Little did we know that it would continue for several months with no real end in sight. 

The way we connect with people has changed.  Just a few months ago, we would use business lunches, trade shows, and company parties to get to know each other.  But the hearty handshake and one-on-one conversations have been replaced by a digital wave from a video chat.  In some ways, that’s perfectly fine.  Sometimes it can actually be more productive to meet in this way.  But in other ways, I’m starting to miss the physical aspect of things.  For example, my 14 year old son just started running cross country with the High School team last week.  He is going to be a freshman this year and I am super excited for him.  I showed up on his first day of practice with the team to introduce myself to the coach and out of habit,  I stuck out my hand for a handshake.  It was the most awkward exchange I’ve had in a long time.  He quickly stuck out his elbow for an elbow bump with an explanation that we’re still in a pandemic.  I felt so dumb for extending a simple jesture of introduction that would have been completely normal 4 months ago but oh so taboo today.

So, I’ve been asking myself, how can I physically connect with someone in a socially distant world?  I’ve always tried to be a thoughtful gift giver, but this year with the pandemic, I’ve really tried to step up my gift giving game.   I have found that a thoughtful gift that is sent to a customer, an employee, or a family member has more impact right now than ever before.  Because people long for a physical connection, a thoughtful physical gift seems to fill a void that people are longing for.  Is it as good as a hearty handshake or a warm embrace?  No.  But until those are again permissible by the CDC, a thoughtful gift will make an impression that will last longer than your toilet paper stash.  

How to Win a Customer For Life

Sometimes it is good to take a step back and ask yourself questions about your business. In that spirit, here is a question for you: Do you spend as much time trying to keep your current customers as you do trying to get new ones?  If the answer is no, it might be a good time to stop and ask yourself, “Why not?”

I was recently reminded of the incredible experience we had with our realtor.  She is AMAZING! She has a client for life in us and I’m excited to share with you what made all the difference.

A couple of years ago we bought a house for our family. We had an incredible experience with our realtor and everything went really smoothly.  Many realtors have the mindset that once the house closes, they are done with that client. But not Debbi. She showed up to our house two months later with a personalized watercolor painting of our house.  A watercolor painting! Then, every couple of months, we would get something in the mail about a family event that was happening with lots of games and prizes.

The one that had the most impact on us, though, is when she showed up in October over two years after we closed on our house with a car full of pumpkins.  She had each of our kids pick out a pumpkin to put on our porch, gave us all hugs and she was on her way. The incredible thing is that she never has asked for a referral.  She doesn’t have to. Anyone we hear of that might be looking for a realtor, we automatically think of Debbi and give them her number. And you better believe that if we ever decide to move, she will be the first person that we call.

I think the most important thing you need to remember is that it doesn’t have to be something big to be impactful.  Just something small that lets your customers know that you are thinking about them can go a long way. So, which of your customers are you going to reach out to today?

Fear Is Worse Than Reality

Today is the first day of school.  In the past couple of weeks leading up to today, my kids have expressed different fears of starting the new school year.  My oldest son especially has always battled anxiety and we are often trying to help him stay calm and not worry so much about what might happen.  As I was talking to him the other night I mentioned that our fears are usually much, much worse than whatever we actually face.  I was also reminded of an experience that I went through last year.

For the previous 10 years, I worked for a candy company.  From a business standpoint, I never felt like we were on solid ground.  We went through three different owners and as a company, we were always struggling financially.  But the last year was the worst.  The last company that bought us never could get financing together, so we never knew paycheck to paycheck if that would be our last.  I worried like I never worried before.  I looked for a new job, I looked into going back to school, I looked into starting my own business, and I was living in constant fear that I wouldn't have the financial means to support my family.  Finally, the day came that they shut the doors and went into bankruptcy.  

I still had fear, but it was a different kind of fear.  Instead of a paralyzing wait and see kind of fear, it was a fear that motivated me into action.  I started contacting everyone I knew to tell them of my situation.  I applied for unemployment.  I took on as many freelance jobs as I could get.  I applied for every job that I was even remotely qualified for.  It was a hard 5 weeks of unemployment full of ups and downs.  But there was also a certain sense of relief.  I no longer had to live in fear of losing my job.  I could just focus all my energy into finding a new one.  And I did.

I was excited to come home from work today and hear all about the first day of school.  I was also relieved that my kid's biggest fears were not their reality.  My daughter's 2nd grade Man Teacher was so super nice.  My son's 4th grade class was quiet and well behaved.  And this dad was reminded that our fears really are many times worse than reality.  

Hello, My Name Is Awesome-Book Review

I have been working on naming several products both at work and with freelance projects lately and looking for some more inspiration.  I came across an agency's website that I loved!  The name of the site is EatMyWords.com.  I loved the name of the website and of the names they have come up with in their portfolio.  I was also happy to find out that the owner of the agency, Alexandra Watkins, wrote a book on the naming process.  It was exactly what I was looking for.  I bought the digital version off of Amazon and read in that afternoon (it was a quick, but good read).  

In the book, she gives some do's and don'ts in the naming process.  She gives some examples of names that are great and are the basis of great brands and some that are really really bad.  She also lays out a very straight forward process of brainstorming names and gives some great resources to look for inspiration.  There is also a test that you can put your name ideas through to help you decide if your ideas are good or not.  You can see a simplified version of the test here on the website.  

If you are stuck coming up with a name for a new product, company or song, I highly recommend checking out this book.  If nothing else, it's bound to help get the creative juices flowing.

Stress Relief-So You Don't Crack

I seem to go a hundred miles an hour until I just crack, like a walnut. The life of a designer and father of four can be stressful.  Packaging design is a big part of whether or not a retailer is going to take our products, so I'm expected to get it right (no pressure!). I don't always do a good job at managing stress, but I thought I would share a few ways that have worked for me through the years, when I put them in practice. 

1. Find a Creative Distraction

This may sound a little strange since I work in a creative profession, but it is such a stress relief when I can find a creative distraction.  It can be anything, really, as long as it can take your mind off of the stress. I've loved doing my 365 photo project these past 30 days. Instead of adding stress as one more thing on my list, it has been a great stress reliever and something creative to look forward to everyday. I’m also amazed how something like 10 minutes of playing the guitar while the kids dance around can melt the stresses of the day away.

2. Exercise 

I know of very few things that can bring stress relief faster than good exercise.  Unfortunately, this is something that I've done a horrible job doing lately. My excuses have been a long commute and awful weather, but I know I would feel much better if I would just exercise more. Running has always been my exercise of choice I am planning to train for a half marathon this spring to whip me back into shape.  I better get moving.

3. Read a Good Book
One of the great benefits of commuting on the train is the time I have to read again.  I go through phases of reading different genres of books.  Right now I am reading $100 Startup by Chris Guillebeau.  I am loving the book and it has so many great ideas and examples of people who have made it in the business world through their own microbusiness.  It's kind of funny to think that reading a business book can be a stress relief, but it certainly can when it helps you think about a bigger and brighter future.

4. Don't Take Things Too Seriously

This is something I struggle with often. I have to remind myself on a regular basis that packaging design for a chocolate company is not a matter of life and death. As long as I work hard and do my best, things are going to work out. They always do.
 

There’s my list of stress relievers.  So, what works for you?

Recharging Creativity

There are times when I feel like there isn't another ounce of creativity in me. It's usually right after getting ready for a big sales appointment or planing a large activity (or both, like I did this week). It's times like these when I wish I could take a couple of days off and just relax. Unfortunately, that is not an option this time of year. So, I have to lean on some ways to keep my creativity and energy levels up and keep up the good fight. Here are some techniques that have worked for me. 

1. Change is as good as a break
There are times when what I am working on just isn't going anywhere. Sometimes it is best to move on to something else, even if it is lower on the priority list.  If I am able to change my focus for awhile, I am almost always able to come back and find creative solutions to the original task. 

2.  Listen to some music
Sometimes I just need to put on the head phones and listen to some music. This usually does two things for me. One, it gives me an added boost to keep the creativity moving. Two, it cuts out the distractions that can be all around in an office situation. I know music isn't always allowed or appropriate at work, but if it is, I highly recommend it. 

3. Help someone else
If I am struggling to be creative, it always helps to look beyond myself and help someone else. When this is done with the right attitude, it always seems to help recharge my creative batteries. Besides, it seems like I'm always needing a favor and people are much more willing to help out when I have done the same for them.

4. Fake it till you make it
Sometimes I am under an incredibly tight deadline and the creativity just isn't there. I have found that if I just keep going, the creative inspiration will come. At times I have to remind myself that I've been in this situation many times before and things have always worked out. 

5. Brainstorm the opposite
When time is on my side and I want to have a little fun getting the juices flowing, I like to brainstorm the opposite. We did this as a product development team at Maxfields Candy as we were developing concepts for Valentine's Day last year. We had some great opposite ideas come out of it. This was mine:

So, if you find yourself drawing a blank creatively, give some of these techniques a try.  You never know where or when your next creative inspiration will come.

Motivating Others: Lessons from a Three-Year-Old

How do you motivate others?  Help them catch your vision?  Get them to see what you see? This is something I've thought a lot about in both my professional and personal life.  Here are a few things I learned from a recent bout with my three-year-old.

A few mornings ago, I took a deep breath and went to tackle the impossible task of helping my son get ready for the day.  He has always had an issue with clothes.  He went through the wear nothing stage.  Now he is in the wear nothing that at least remotely resembles Spiderman.  If it's not red or blue, you can forget about it.  Trying to put clothes on a three-year-old that doesn't want to wear them is about the closest that I've come to steer wresting.  Here are a few things I learned about motivation through this process.

1. Your attitude is going to greatly influence their reaction
If I am in a hurry or in a bad mood, getting my son to get ready for the day never goes well.  I believe he picks up on my mood and if I'm ready to fight to get his clothes on, he is ready to fight back.  Sadly to say, the stubborn three-year-old almost always wins in the situation.  But if I can approach him in a fun and loving way, he softens like a little puffball and is much more likely to do what I need him to do.

The same goes when I am trying to motivate my staff or co-workers.  If I go into a conversation with the wrong attitude, it never goes well.  Things I say are going to be taken the wrong way and people end up demotivated instead.  But if I can stay positive and upbeat in my conversations, people are much more likely to understand and be motivated to do what I say.

2. Tell them what it will do for them
I found a little trick that has helped me be more successful in the dressing a three-year-old department.  If I can find the smallest little detail about his clothing and tell him how it relates to Spiderman, he will almost always put the clothes on.  It can be as small as finding the stripes on his pants and telling him that they are actually webs and will give him more web blasting super powers.  It may not sound like much, but he eats it up.  

Sometimes all you need to do is help someone catch the vision of how a task will have an impact on the company and their personal or professional development.  Think of Daniel from the classic movie Karate Kid.  He resented the menial tasks he was doing until Mr. Miyagi showed him how they were turning him into a Karate master.  The same will happen to you when you help others catch the vision of what they are doing.

3. A little extra incentive goes a long way
I'm not sure this is exactly good parenting practice, but if things are going rough and nothing else is working I have been know to throw in a little bribe.  It's amazing what a small piece of candy will do to get a little boy to cooperate.  

It is important to note that not everyone is motivated by incentives in the same way.  Most people will tell you that they are motivated by money, which to some degree is probably true. But many people are much more motivated by other things that really don't cost a thing. Sometimes just giving people ownership over a project or giving them special recognition in a company meeting is much more motivating than a pay raise or bonus ever would be.  That being said, I've never met anyone that didn't gladly accept a pay raise or bonus.

Something that I've learned in both parenting and leadership is that there is rarely  a one-size-fits-all answer to a challenging question.  My hope is that this will give you a few ideas of things to try, whether you are trying to wrestle clothes on a Spiderman three-year-old or motivate your team to take things to the next level.